They are mostly used for bouncing.

Chicanery: TEA RULES.

siansheep:

My understanding of tea etiquette in Britain is:

OFFER YOUR GUEST TEA AS SOON AS THEY ARRIVE - GIVE THEM THE LARGER MUG, BECAUSE THEN THEY CAN HAVE MORE TEA IN IT, AND MORE TEA IS BETTER - OFFER THEM MORE TEA AS SOON AS THEY HAVE FINISHED THEIR MUG OF TEA, BECAUSE MORE TEA IS…

Brotherhood

It starts, really, with the cat. Skinny thing, tufted, feral: it poses regally enough, but swipes at him like a desperate vagrant whenever he gets too close. He apologises to it, a simple ‘I’m sorry’ to start with, building into a rambling explanation of the whys and wherefores when he takes note of the way its big, pointed ears swivel about at the sound of his voice.

‘Really it’s nothing personal, and I’d sooner learn from a textbook than go poking at you, but you know how tutors are – do you know how tutors are? Stuffy mostly, and much too set on things being done their own way every time, if you ask me.’

This isn’t exactly a task set by a tutor, but the prefects whose ranks he hopes to join. He’s young for it at twenty-seven, a full three exams away from the average magical aptitude level of the others, but his father’s stern assertions have made Baelmyrr Alvantaris well aware that he’s not doing the family proud just yet, and this seems as sound a way as any to claw his way back into Haelmyrr’s good books, a task he has become familiar with over the years.

For this attempt, he must familiarise himself with the cat. The prefects weren’t entirely exhaustive with the details; rather, he knows only that he must spend the weekend with the creature, studying it and making sure it doesn’t starve in the process. Baelmyrr suspects starvation would be more the culmination of prior months of malnourishment than his own failure as a provider in the case of his particular stray, but has no intention of raising this point. Instead, he practices his conjuring. He summons up fish, minced steak and milk in silver bowls, and resolves that his subject will leave his care in far better health than it came – if he parts with it at all.

 

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(Source: fanfiction.net)

Obituary

Because fanfiction.net is too constricting for me to be happy posting this story there, here’s a blogspot cage for it… The harried memoirs of Apothecary Lydon.

aros:

Outlets

Globetrotting antics have left me certain that the UK can claim the award for the most bloody painful plug to step on in bare feet.

aros:

Outlets

Globetrotting antics have left me certain that the UK can claim the award for the most bloody painful plug to step on in bare feet.

A bit of roleplay prose

Because sometimes everyone else wanders off and leaves two of your characters alone, and it’s rude to textwall.

The end of the RP scene:

Lydon glances around at the empty roof, then sidelong at Miriah. He swallows and goes to walk to the edge of the roof as well, but Miriah has him by the wrist still.

‘Warn… the elf girl… next shift,’ he says.

‘…In an hour you may accompany me to do just that,’ says Miriah. ‘In the meantime.’ She walks further toward the centre of the roof, pulling him along behind her, and releases his wrist only to sit, set down the frying pan and pat the roof slates next to her. ‘I believe we have a few things to discuss before Praelia surgically reattaches herself to me, hn?’

And a bit of prose elaboration:

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So I’m learning how to drive… and I really need one of these.

So I’m learning how to drive… and I really need one of these.

Uni grad versus book report

(16:05:55) Cass: She’s all, I have to write a book report! Cassie, you did book reports at university, halp me!
(16:06:05) Cass: …so er. I surrender. AFK for a bit
(16:07:03) Jon: ….’kay. ._.; Do retain hyur sanity.
(16:14:11) Cass: “Who is the narr- main character?”
(16:14:14) Cass: “The gruffalo!”
(16:14:19) Cass: “…Are you sure?”
(16:14:25) Cass: “YES his name is on the front of the book!”
(16:14:49) Cass: “But does the story follow what he is doing?”
(16:14:51) Cass: “Yes!”
(16:16:52) Cass: “…IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT, the gruffalo is nothing more than a concept at the start; he exists only through the imagination of those encouraged to construct him through various physical features - those people being the fox and the snake and the owl and, actually, you, so in a way the animals are stand-ins for you which is actually quite interesting because it means that while you are in the loop where mouse’s deception is concerned you’re also a little bit like the villains, led to believe something un- (noticing pointed glare) I’llstopnow.”
(16:18:26) Cass: My dad all …well. that was good use of your breath.
(16:18:30) Cass: me all …inorite.
(16:18:39) Cass: PUT THAT IN YOUR BOOK REPORT AND SMOKE IT
(16:18:41) Jon: …. <3 That was beautiful deconstruction
(16:18:42) Cass: ornot
(16:18:56) Cass: ;p
(16:18:58) Cass: Thankee, thankee
(16:19:33) Jon: You are most welcome ofc!
(16:19:39) Cass: I approve of The Gruffalo
(16:19:51) Cass: It didn’t seem to exist when I was a kid, so it is unusual that I like it >.>
(16:20:19) Cass: But! I think it sits quite comfortably with proper children’s tales, where the morality of it all is dubious at best
(16:21:06) Cass: I mean. What a cutthroat world, eh? Only way to keep yourself from being eaten is to turn yourself into someone who eats everyone else - by mimicking the oppressor, rite! Through deception! The threat of violence!
(16:21:38) Cass: Mouse may later go on to set up a protection racket
(16:21:50) Jon: …The threat of BATMAN rite ‘cept he was doing it right.
(16:22:12) Cass: …Mouse: I AM BATMAN
(16:22:30) Jon: I AM VENGEANCE I AM THE NIGHT I AM BATMAN
(16:23:01) Cass: Compare the ways in which popular fiction carries similar themes from nursery to adulthood, with reference to Batman and The Gruffalo.
(16:23:20) Jon: …
(16:23:26) Jon: Is that a challenge?
(16:23:33) Cass: Are you up to it?
(16:23:39) Jon: ….Word count?
(16:23:43) Cass: 45lk
(16:23:45) Cass: …k
(16:23:56) Jon: ….duedate?
(16:24:09) Cass: …There is no word count and no due date
(16:24:15) Cass: This ain’t cushy uni yo
(16:24:27) Cass: This is… wild essay attack
(16:24:29) Jon: Oho. I know you din’ just say that.
(16:24:49) Cass: FIGHT BAG
PKMN RUN
(16:24:52) Jon: …Fien… I will work on this from tomorrow when I can prep my day for it : P
(16:24:53) Jon: rofl
(16:24:59) Jon: nono
(16:25:33) Jon: WRITE RFRNCE
(16:25:36) Cass: : D
(16:25:51) Jon: SUBVERT EXTNSN
(16:25:57) Cass: WOAH WOAH WOAH
(16:26:05) Cass: Clearlry RUN = MNSTR
(16:26:11) Cass: clearly*
(16:26:19) Jon: MNSTR?
(16:26:32) Cass: or RLNTLSS. RDBLL.
(16:26:36) Jon: xD
(16:26:43) Jon: PRCRSTNTE
(16:29:20) Cass: That is what I use every time.

This amused me after some time enduring a small child, so here it is on the off chance it amuses you too.

So I made this because I run into so many derpfaces in heroics that I reckon they must be queuing for that specific role.
I feel I can safely tick that box and queue away, by the by, because after hours spent tanking heroics, I feel I have trained in the presence of true herpderp winnars.

So I made this because I run into so many derpfaces in heroics that I reckon they must be queuing for that specific role.

I feel I can safely tick that box and queue away, by the by, because after hours spent tanking heroics, I feel I have trained in the presence of true herpderp winnars.

Obituary Part II

[Warnings for death and suicide]

Undeath took me because, in my quest to destroy the Barovs, Kirtonos and their pitbull the Butcher, I added necromancy to my repertoire. I reasoned that if my own heart was so long-gone that I could stab a woman through hers without flinching, I had no reason to maintain the illusion of life. I trained at twice the speed of my fellow initiates and that was roughly the best learning curve my potential would allow. It still took years before I moved from theory to practice, by which time my voice had ceased to break and settled instead at the lower end of tenor, my bones had grown at a rate my muscles could not match, so I stood at six foot four, skeletal thin, and my facial features had lengthened into the long, narrow configuration that I retain to this day.

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Warcraft: Obituary Part I

[Warnings for torture, suicide and general morbidity]

Three weeks ago, I concluded my work in Arathi, suturing the holes in Hammerfall’s staff with suitable members of the Forsaken. A doctor. A handful of deathstalkers, for the more subtle breed of excursions against Stromguard. An apothecary. The Defilers were far more grateful than the orcs, as was to be expected.

I left on horseback, and I stopped at Tarren Mill in Hillsbrad and the Sepulcher in Silverpine. I gathered reports from the executors and the deathstalkers and the apothecaries, and I bore their words back to Tirisfal and the Undercity. I gave an overview of the situation in all these Forsaken provinces to Lord Gahs of the House of Sylvanas just this morning, and was to return to my efforts at bolstering Forsaken numbers through necromancy alongside the considerably more powerful Bethor Iceshard.

These are the facts I remember clearly, but as I note even these events are beginning to fray, I fear for the rest. And so I write this because I suspect I am dying. Pathetic, I know, that suspicion is the most I can manage, especially when so many of those around me are unusually gifted with first hand experience of passing – of death – but it is not an ordeal I have truly undertaken myself.

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shazzbaa:

THIS.
I have always loved the advice “You have one-thousand terrible drawings in you. The sooner you get them out, the better.”
Even your crap work is making you better. Keep creating.

shazzbaa:

THIS.

I have always loved the advice “You have one-thousand terrible drawings in you. The sooner you get them out, the better.”

Even your crap work is making you better. Keep creating.

(Source: sharptongue)

definatalie:

lightning-heart:

definatalie:

Image - an animated gif of me wearing a purple top and black fringed shirt, shaking my hips from side to side.
Photo - Kate O’Brien
d0rkyg1rl:

How cute is this DIY fringe skirt? Adding it to my list of Thing I Must Make.

Ha it’s me!

why have i never seen this beforrrrrrrrrre, so cute!

Ha! It still makes me laugh!!

definatalie:

lightning-heart:

definatalie:

Image - an animated gif of me wearing a purple top and black fringed shirt, shaking my hips from side to side.

Photo - Kate O’Brien

d0rkyg1rl:

How cute is this DIY fringe skirt? Adding it to my list of Thing I Must Make.

Ha it’s me!

why have i never seen this beforrrrrrrrrre, so cute!

Ha! It still makes me laugh!!

(via fancybidet)

This is definitely the Bulma I have in mind when writing All Good Things. She is amazing. &lt;3

This is definitely the Bulma I have in mind when writing All Good Things. She is amazing. <3

(Source: super-saiyans)

Prompt: a day in the life of archaeology (10 minutes)

With the ball of twine in hand, he paced about the room. The first pass put the coffee table, with its mug of cold tea, the stack of journals and his bifocal glasses, the back of the sofa, with its damp damage and its too-soft cushions, and the lamp with the dead bulb he’d yet to change into column A.

Column B held the red wine stain in the carpet and the front of the sofa with its clinking change somewhere down there amongst the springs and biscuit crumbs. Column C had the rug he’d brought back from Argentina and almost lost to customs; D had the armchair with his favourite tweed jacket and the bookshelf laden with his own take on bric-a-brac (ordered by era, naturally).

He cut the string at the top of each column, pinned it in place, moved onto the next, and finally started on the rows. With effort, the living room sat in comfortable, orderly squares. He set down the twine, lifted his fountain pen and his moleskin, and wrote out carefully, ‘A-one.’

Then came the brush. He dusted over the coffee cup rings and around the stack of journals. He lifted each issue, noted their date and position, dusted beneath them and set them aside in a neat plastic bag. The mug went in another. He labelled both bags A-one, and took his glasses as a personal prize: off the record, of course.

It was only in D-four, in the pocket of that damn jacket, that his brush cleared crumbs from metal, and at last he uncovered his keys.

Epic Planning

I’ve been away for a week of November so my silence has largely been owed to:

-physical absence

-bawling over my bleeding fingers as I try to catch up with NaNoWriMo.

Oh, alright. I’m actually behind with NaNoWriMo because I nearly caught up after the break, then slacked off like a big slackery slacker whose fingers aren’t even slightly red raw. In fact, you can see how much I slacked off on my slack off page my stat page.

I have Some Things to say but they will have to wait for now, because I am away on the weekend too so I really have to finish in the next four days. It is going to be ridiculous. In the meantime, I will diligently reblog things to make it look like I am not dead to the Tumblr world. Because I am cool like that.

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